I wanted to talk about something not-so-controversial, but pretty personal. Over the last year, I've really started to enjoy reading blogs. I forget who originally posted the link to the Good Women Project website, but I read an article entitled "Dear Sister: An Apology From an Adulterer at Heart" and I was hooked. There were people on the internet, who existed outside of Facebook and Twitter, and had real opinions on raw life subjects. Subjects that made me uncomfortable: rape, pornography, being a Jesus-loving woman but ALSO a sexual being. Topics that I've never really talked about with my friends. It blew my mind that people had websites devoted to delving into difficult subjects. I checked Good Women Project on the daily, and soon became infatuated with the founder, Lauren Dubinsky. Here is this beautiful woman, who didn't have a perfect squeaky-clean life, telling other women that IT'S OKAY to make mistakes, make your own decisions, and voice your opinions (no matter what side of the issues you are on.)
I posted link after link, sharing them on Facebook, Twitter, and with my friends. Liesl, Ashley and I swapped articles from the site and would talk about them. But I didn't necessarily know how to talk about these things with some of my friends from high school, or older, adult women. I'm the type of person who doesn't like to form opinions about these things. It's not as easy as chocolate or vanilla, Duke or UNC, grad school or working at a theatre. It's more of "what's the right form of feminism or should I let the men run everything, rape culture or victim blaming, slut shaming or virgin shaming, labels within Christianity or actively being/doing what Christ calls us to be/do." Heavy things that I should probably have thought about during college when I had the chance to have these conversations with people wiser than I.
So lately, I've been opening up my Facebook statuses for these conversations. I LOVE reading people's responses/opinions, and I give every comment a "like" which doesn't necessarily mean I agree with them, it's more of an acknowledgement and an appreciation for their well thought out response. There was this time a few weeks ago that I was personally attacked for voicing my opinion on a status. The attack came from a holier than thou woman who doesn't know me or my character AT ALL. Being attacked like that does something to your psyche. But it's a whole different ball game when you feel personally attacked while reading comments on other blogs or Tweets that might not line up with yours. It's a weird feeling...physically, it's like someone is sitting on your chest telling you that you're wrong, and you need to change your opinion lest ye be hanged. I don't know, it's strange.
I digress, I've been craving responses to these topics because I'm still learning. I had a terrible youth group experience (more on that on some other day), and my family left our church when I was a sophomore in college. I didn't get the deep "Christians and dating" lessons that a lot of people did. Of course my parents told me what kind of person they wanted me to strive to date. I certainly have no clue or opinions about the "wives submit to your husbands" passage in the Bible, because it's not something I've ever experienced.
The reason I ask questions is because I want to be informed. I'm not ok with just concrete answers. It's part of my personality, I guess. I care about others' opinions as long as people don't start pointing fingers and name calling all over my status. And I love reading blogs. And I would encourage you all to start reading blogs. The Good Women Project is a great place to start, and I'll list some others after the jump.
I would also prompt you to start asking questions and voicing your opinion. So many of us are scared of being judged or taunted, but there are whole communities online that encourage these types of conversations. You'll be surprised at what you learn!
shine bright!
-s.
Speaking Up - Emily Maynard (Not the same one from The Bachelorette.)
See Preston Blog -Preston Yancy
laurennicolelove - Lauren Dubinsky
Make it MAD- Max Dubinsky (Yes, Lauren's husband!)
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